Interpersonal Communication &Nbsp; Start With Knowing Yourself.

Roosevelt said: "the most important factor in the formula of success is to get along with others."

Interpersonal relationships are necessary in our life, so how do we master interpersonal communication skills?

A 25 year old friend once told me, "before I was 25, I really didn't know the profound meaning of" interpersonal communication ".

Because honest and upright, although talented, but do not know interpersonal communication, offend many people.

After graduating from University, he became an editor of a media. He was deeply valued by the leaders. Before the leadership arranged for him to study in England, he had a "contradiction" with the real power of the magazine. Unfortunately, in retrospect, actually, he did not work in accordance with the intentions of the real power, and did not ask for any communication. He failed to create a positive atmosphere between him and his leadership and neglected the importance of the leadership.

Although the same effect has been achieved, the real power group thinks he is "disobedient".

To this end, two people quarreled in the unit, the real power faction said: do you want to do?

Refuse to leave!

The friend just walked into the workplace and was totally dissatisfied, so he resigned without hesitation.

When he said good-bye to the leader, he highly valued his leader and said, "how can you not eat bitterness?

No psychological tolerance. "

After that, the young friend calmed down and thought that the word "leadership" really hit the nail on the head and pointed out his weakness.

In fact, this sentence just proves George Meo's Theory: "the ability to cooperate with others is the ability of people to adapt to the environment". Simply speaking, they can endure hardship. This kind of suffering may be the physical or psychological hardship exerted by others, and it may well be the torment of "deliberate".

In fact, young people are honest and upright, lack of psychological endurance.

A reporter friend told such a story.

In order to write an article about "China US global positioning system", he paid a lot of painstaking efforts to interview, collect and sort out a lot of data.

After the publication of the article, the editor in chief put forward some ideas that could be further improved in the public appraisal meeting. The editor said: "before the publication, I read the article. The characteristics of the Chinese and American" GPS "were very comprehensive. But the article did not point out the fundamental difference between the two. That is, there is no" cesium fountain clock "on the homemade navigation satellite, and the US satellite installed it.

Indeed, the editor in chief has pointed out the "soft rib" of the article.

But what puzzles is, why not break it in advance?

The editor's comments made him angry.

Despite the fact that the journalist once thought that it was the editor in chief who deliberately made the whole story, he also examined the manuscript. Why not publish it and make it more perfect?

Later, he realized that there is no hard entropy in the article. The essential difference between the editor and the editor can be said.

Besides, before the publication, it was pointed out that the reporters' impression was never so deep.

This editor uses the "influence skills" in interpersonal communication, skillfully trying to persuade reporters, changing the attitude and behavior of journalists, encouraging and encouraging reporters to consult with others in business, and prove it in many ways.

So I thought of another Beijing media friend.

He has complained to me for many times because of his hard work and pressure. He worked overtime until more than eleven o'clock every day. When he was a journalist and an editor and a host, his salary was only more than 3000. He was too tired.

Because work pressure, long working hours, less than thirty years old, cervical spondylosis, fatty liver, high blood lipids, all body disease.

What most can't bear for his friend is that he has been unable to work outside the office for more than ten hours, so his family's financial burden is very hard to maintain on the basis of wages.

He said, "I really cannot quit."

But he did not resign.

After being tortured for two years, he was sent to the station as a reporter.

After many years, when I saw my old friend again, I learned that he had done his homework and his family account in Beijing was also implemented.

After experiencing or witnessing something, people may gradually realize that it is not easy to endure hardships and disappointments, but it is really conducive to their own growth.

The purpose of interpersonal communication is not control.

These three stories are well worth sharing, but

Generally speaking, people do not understand interpersonal communication to a slightly one or two, and then to the right and left, their enjoyment of interpersonal communication is also getting more and more distant.

When people think that the relationship between colleagues in a workplace is utilitarian or "zero sum", the relationship between the upper and lower levels is only controlled and controlled, so utilitarian employees choose the "communication control" of laisville.

In their mind, the essence of interpersonal communication is to achieve the goal of controlling their colleagues intentional, and then achieve self serving utilitarian goals.

In fact, such changes indicate that people in the workplace are or have accepted the idea of "interpersonal communication is the control of others" and practise it.

Such a fact is regrettable because they ignore the subjective initiative of the controlled person, and neglect the influence of social culture, social environment and other factors on interpersonal communication.

The Frankfurt School of communication has made profound achievements in philosophy.

Martin Bubb, a master of communication, holds that a relationship between man and the world is the relationship between "me and you". "I" and "you" are not separated but integrated into one. "I" do not set up "relationship" for utilitarian purposes, nor do they use reason to analyze the relationship between "you" and "me - you" and get rid of the relationship of mutual use and realize the value of human existence.

At the same time, it put forward a proposition that the secular society had to think about: how should we face others honestly and face the nature.

Even if we do not follow the sage, we should be patient and persuade. People accept the idea of "interpersonal communication is the goal of building and developing relationships". Workplace interpersonal communication should respect the communication objects, understand him deeply, and establish and develop a win-win workplace interpersonal relationship.

To put it another step, people nowadays are not stupid. They merely pursue the utilitarian and emphasize the control. They only regard the communication object as a "target" and an obstacle or tool to achieve their personal goals. In the interpersonal communication of the workplace, it is difficult to establish lasting and real interpersonal relationships by playing with the means and manipulate the power.

Bypassing these interpersonal communication skills is not to put others on foot, but to reduce the resistance in work, and to realize the original fate of people who are good for themselves, others and society.

If interpersonal communication is settled, chances for success will naturally increase.